Monthly Archives: May 2013

Those of you who have known me for a reasonably long time will know that, for about 18 years, from around 1987 onwards, I had the privilege of travelling all over the world (for those who HAVEN’T known me for a long time, that’s not because I’m rich – just the opposite, in fact! – no salary since 18th January 1979!) speaking at Youth with a Mission schools, amongst many other things that filled my diary.

Around ’87, God began to get very persistent with me about this travelling lark: coming from a family of confirmed, static Brits – and south-east of England Brits, at that! – and prophecy followed prophecy in a very concentrated time-frame that I was to travel. I thought that, in giving up my job in the NatWest bank, and thus giving up income (1979), going into full-time Christian ministry (whatever that means, really – surely we’re ALL full-time if we’re in the place that God wants us to be?) with British Youth for Christ: and then giving up YFC, to go to Roffey Place Christian Training Centre in 1983, with God requiring me to give up the last house I ever ‘owned’, was sufficient ‘sacrifice’ on my part where ‘giving up stuff’ was concerned.

How wrong can you be! The ‘call’ – did I jump or was I pushed? – to travel demanded all sorts of other things to give up. Being English, for starters: I realised pretty fast, in Africa in the early days, and elsewhere since, that it’s impossible to travel in mission and remain ‘an Englishman abroad’! I patently didn’t want to go to Africa OR India when that initial call came. God must have laughed like a drain when I told Him I’d go anywhere except to those continents… within 12 hours I’d been invited to Ghana, to speak at Youth with a Mission. They gave me 5 different subjects, one a day for 5 days. I really can’t recall what four of them were, now.

The one I do remember gripped me as I prepared to go, even though I didn’t want to. Faithful Biney, the Ghana YWAM Director (then? He may still be, it’s been a while since I went!). It was simply titled ‘Goals, Dreams, & Visions’. I remember thinking at the time I knew nothing about ANY of the 5 subjects, but how the heck would I fill 3 hours (that’s the average morning teaching time per day in most YWAM bases), on THAT subject?

For those who had the misfortune to hear me, you’ll remember that it was my ‘pet’ subject, that opened doors to countries – literally – from New Zealand to Canada, and Argentina to Russia & Korea. I thought up until ’87 I’d been a bit of a ‘radical dreamer’: I was to learn oh so much more!

‘Goals, Dreams, & Visions’ are clearly in God’s heart for us. ‘Without vision, the people perish’ (Proverbs 29:18, King James), ‘In the last days, I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh: young men (me – I’m young at heart, I think!) will dream dreams; old men (me – I’m 60 now!) will see visions; sons & daughters (me!) will prophesy’.

So often, though, for most people (and I include myself in that, but like I’ve said, God has been pretty ruthless with me with his pointy stick to make me go), the cost of going/being/doing can be too great.

I picked up a little book in a Christian bookshop just a few days ago: John Piper’s ‘Risk is Right’ – subtitled ‘Better to lose your life than waste it’. John would be a somewhat

more ‘conservative’ preacher than – me(?) – but the title made me buy it.And boy, do I love his writing and teaching. Then I found a much bigger tome of his, ‘Don’t waste your life’. You know, this must be pretty high on God’s agenda, this sort of theme running through our lives, because there is one verse repeated by all FOUR gospel writers, and Matthew considered it essential enough to include it TWICE. Matthew 10:39, 16:25; Mark 8:35; Luke 9:24; John 12:25.

‘For whoever wants to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for me, will find it’.

Those five verses impacted me so much that ‘Goals, Dreams, & Visions’ developed as I spoke it, to fill at first, the 15 hour teaching week in YWAM, and then, 2 full weeks.

I wrote here a few days ago (‘A week of utter contrasts’) about possessions, my ‘stuff: then, as I’ve been before, I was indignant because it was my ‘stuff’ by right. By Friday, I think I can honestly say that I could not care less about ‘my stuff’ now, as God, with His overwhelming grace, love, mercy, and pointy stick, brought me back to preferring to lose my life, rather than waste it on stuff, comfort zones, pension, you name it…. (by the way, I DO have a pension! – it will be £10 a week from the NatWest bank, I can’t wait for it, as it will revolutionise my life! Not!).

Thank you, John Piper, just for the title of your little book that brought me back to the reality I prefer, rather than the ‘reality’ of lost or sacrificed stuff. I shall start reading it today….

When I withdrew from the YWAM circuit, ‘Goals, Dreams, & Visions’ (which I can adapt to a ‘sermon’, not just 15-30 hours of teaching!!) sort of went on the back burner. Maybe I need to resurrect it again. What do you think?

P.S. When I first ever spoke on ‘Goals,Dreams, & Visions’ in Cali, Colombia, 16-17 years ago, my wonderful friend Hendrik Hoere, a Dutchman and his lovely Finnish wife, Teija, missionaries in

Colombia (then) for 12-13 years – it’s pushing 30 now – translated. In the King James, Proverbs 29:18 I’ve already quoted. In the NIV, it says something very different: ‘Without revelation, the people cast off restraint’. Seeing as I wanted to be colloquial, in Cali, I read the Spanish version. ‘Without prophecy, the people run like a car without brakes!’. Hendrik had not got used to my voice at that stage, and was, of course, translating from his second to his third language, which is an incredible feat. I spoke in English the Spanish translation, which he translated as ‘Without prophecy, the people run like a cow without brains’…..! Hence the blog title! We still laugh about it a lot now, but truly, Hendrik is one of the best translators I’ve ever had the privilege of working with, anywhere!

I’ve not posted here for a few days: as I’ve said before, I don’t want to post when all I have to report is what I’ve eaten for dinner, what I watched on TV, how many visits to the loo, etc., as seem to be a lot ‘Facebook’ posts! – but it has been a week of exceedingly mixed emotions, and contrast.

The ‘upside’ is that my dear friends Alan & Barbara – and yours truly! – have confirmed a July visit to wonderful Cali, Colombia. Wonderfully, God has provided for us all, the means to get there, or most of it: we wondered why the ticket prices were so high, as it’s not like Colombia has a ‘summer’ season, like we do: seasons there are dry and rainy, temperatures remain pretty much the same year round. THEN, Barbara discovered the reason – one I should have remembered! – that the 2013 World Games happen whilst we are there! No wonder airlines have increased their fares… 🙁 – but it should make the city even more enjoyable, and the taxi drivers even more manic!

There’s a brilliant promo video for the Games – here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yE8fA6FU42U&feature=youtu.be

– well worth a watch if you have a historic, stereotypical image of what this wonderful city is like. It’s going to be so wonderful to be there with A & B!

The other side of the coin is another of those ‘thorny’ issues that seem to be constantly bombarding me, concerning the USA. A little of my ‘stuff’ from the house there is now, theoretically, ‘on the water’ across the Atlantic, en route for Belfast. Other of said ‘stuff’ was supposed to have been sold, following Lee’s visit to sort the house out, last November. Nothing got sold, or even advertised: but basically, it was ‘home’. It was a bit of a shock to discover that ‘home’ had been sold for a little over US$300: I was anticipating that it would be at least four figures, and beginning with a reasonable number!

Seven years ago, my home in Worthing was burgled twice, and arson-attacked: anyone who has had the misfortune of being burgled will know the feeling of ‘violation’ it brings. For a couple of days this week, I felt even more ‘violated’, especially when you factor in that the house, owned by two dear friends in the UK, needs, it seems, to be redecorated before it can be sold, and the owners reimbursed with the sale proceeds. The house was supposedly redecorated some 2¾ years ago (don’t forget I’ve not been there for 4 years!) after a huge flood: and to my knowledge, no one has lived there since….

I have to confess, Tuesday night, and Wednesday, to being somewhat angry – I think (hope?) it was righteous anger, and feeling extremely ‘let-down’: but Wednesday, I sat here at my computer, and suddenly had an astonishing pain in my chest, the like of which I’d never experienced, but that I’ve heard people who have had heart-attacks, describe. I realised pretty quickly it was stress, and sat here, and, as best I could, shouted TO God and AT Satan – one to ask him stop the pain, and the crushing feeling, the other to leave me alone and get his hands off of me…. I’m delighted to say, it went…. Stress, and anything related to it that causes it, can do astonishing things to you physically, can’t it? I realised, too, that some of the stress was caused through losing my ‘stuff’…. four times now I’ve lost my home, almost in its entirety, and I always feel that I’ve dealt with what possessions can do to you, only to discover there’s another measure of it that I haven’t dealt with! Hopefully, that was the last time… and I’ve learned now…

If you’ve ever lost your home, you’ll know what I mean. But once again, I had to let God take care of what I couldn’t do anything about, and today, I can look at the loss now, and just say – ‘o.k., it’s gone: what now, Lord?’ My belief is that we don’t know how much possessions mean to us until we don’t have them anymore… and how they can cripple us, affect us, and even disable us spiritually.

For 36 hours, I was, I’ll admit, in the pits. I’m not now, thankfully, and thank you, Lord! So, tonight, to celebrate, I’m heading off to the Odyssey auditorium in Belfast to see what was given to me as a 60th birthday gift – a concert with the amazing Eric Clapton – his 50th anniversary tour! Then I’ll get home, and, into the night, watch the recording of Brighton & Hove Albion, one of my two football ‘loves’ (West Ham being the other), thrash arch-enemies Crystal Palace in the first leg of the Championship play-off semi-finals! Thank God for music and football! (the proper sort, not that American namby-pamby helmets and ‘Dallas-like’ shoulder pads sort – that’s just rugby for wimps!)….

Many years ago, Michael W. Smith wrote one of his best ever songs, ‘Friends’, which has in the ‘chorus’ the title of this blog. Powerful, poignant, true. I’m grateful to God for friends: not merely acquaintances, but people who have stood with me, loved me, cared for me, believed me AND believed in me, helped me, listened to me ‘rant’, let me cry…. The past three days over in England has been filled with people like that. Friendship, I’ve discovered – so often the hard way – can be a ‘one-way street’ – plenty of taking with very little giving, ‘friends’ until your ‘usefulness’ to someone else has run out, friends to whom you’ve given hours, weeks, months, even years – of love, care, blessing, listening – only to discover that when YOU need those ‘attributes’ from them, they’re not there.

I have always been a ‘believe the best of’ sort of person, and, up to a few years ago, there are countless people I’d have listed in my group of ‘really close friends’. I often had other people tell me that I called people ‘friends’ too quickly, but to be honest – then – I saw that as an attribute. The past few years has seen me ‘shave’ a good few people off of that list, and some, whilst still in contact or communication from time to time, out of my life.

That’s why – for me – the past few days were important. If you want to keep people you’re close to, close to you, you have to make an effort…. go and see them. OK  I know, sometimes distance makes it difficult, but there’s always a way – what with brilliant web communication like Skype, FaceTime, and so on….but nothing beats just BEING with people.

On Thursday, I went to visit an long-time friend, and encourager, John, in Rustington: John’s not saved, but he loves what I do, and he loves that I don’t forget him… I had a great evening with my lovely friends Lee & Katie, who were in Cali with me, Friday I met up, and had the privilege of praying with, a long-time friend, we hadn’t met for – we estimate conservatively! – 38 years – BUT, we are in touch through Facebook. Fran is one of my greatest encouragers when it comes to telling of what Jesus does on trips to places that – until now – her MS & fibromyalgia has prevented her going to. It was lovely to catch up.

Friday afternoon, I went to see my ‘old’ friend Paul, in Brighton. We met in the late ’90’s when I bought a computer from his shop. He wasn’t a Christian, in fact, then, just the opposite, but we became friends – very good friends – and four-years after we first met, he was in Cali with me, witnessing first hand miracles, healings, and meeting people who SHOULD have been dead. As he said later, ‘When you’ve just had a meal with someone who should have been dead a year, but isn’t dead because God healed them, you can’t deny it, and it changes your life’. Having found faith in an environment of miracles, salvations, healings… you can understand that Paul found/finds British churches somewhat…er…cautious, and frustrating! We had a fantastic few hours together.

Friday evening, I was with my dear friends, Richard & Linda Williams, and their lovely son (Alex) and daughter (Jess – Jess designed my ‘airplane’ logo), it was so lovely to be with them, and stay the night in their home.

Saturday morning was my one ‘black spot’ of the weekend – a real error of judgment! – I went to ‘do’ a car boot sale, to raise some much-needed cash. To say that, after the pounding my poor old knees had taken with the medic on Wednesday, my knees suffered, from being out in the cold (I was out at 6.30 am), standing a long time negotiating economic mayhem with the punters, and lifting and carrying the stuff to sell, would be a huge understatement! I’m paying for it tonight!

BUT… knees were put aside lunchtime when I met up with other long-time friends Clive & Jan, for a lovely meal outside Worthing. Again, we haven’t ‘seen’ each other for a long time, but we do keep in contact through Facebook.

The journey home, last night, with my right knee significantly worse, was a wee bit difficult, but I’m home: and I’m so glad that I committed the time to friends, and they committed their time to me. I didn’t want anything more from them, nor they from me, than time together. That’s special.

It feels a bit like that to me the past 24 hours! Jesus said it in Luke 4:23 – Yesterday, of course, I was at the bowel cancer screening centre, today at the ICATS (Trauma & orthopaedic, it seems to stand for, somehow!) about the jolly little joints half way down my legs….

The good news (!) is that Janet Eaves, who’s one of the medics there, can’t believe I can actually WALK on these legs, having taken a few more x-rays today. What with my camera session for the ‘rear end’ of my anatomy (that’s June 11, if you’re thinking of praying for me), I shall be the most photographed celebrity in the North Down hospitals network….! As I’ve said in past blogs, truth is the knees haven’t been as bad pain-wise, but looking at the x-rays today, even I could see that they’re in a pretty bad way!

So: humanly, I’m now being referred to an Orthopaedic Surgeon, which will probably be in about 3 months, with the recommendation for replacing both of my knees (not in one go, of course! – 6 months between them). I have to admit that looking at the x-rays this morning, as a complete ‘amateur, I could see how bad they are. There is nothing between the main bones in my thigh and shin on EITHER leg: cartilage has done a runner, which is a lot more than I can do without it: (well, it’s in small pieces floating at the back of my knees). There’s a ‘spur’ growing on my right kneecap, too… and the damage to the knees has flattened my feet! What a wreck! Physician…. indeed!!!

And so: not humanly! – I know much more specifically where to target the prayer now! Seeing a surgeon doesn’t commit me to anything: I don’t want to be ‘irresponsible’ by saying ‘no thank you’ when perhaps a scan, which is what I’ll get, I guess, when I’ve seen the big cheese, will give a clear picture – by then – that God has healed them… so I’m glad today’s x-rays were so bad….

Janet laughed when I told her what I do for a ‘living’ – not AT what I do, but what it demands of these legs! I told her I still plan to be doing this in 20-30 years’ time. And, the offer of knee replacements is not normally given to people much less than 70…. and I have a long way to go before that one! It makes me even more glad that I do what I do, and love doing it, because if I didn’t, I’d probably have signed off disabled a long time back…. and the enemy doesn’t realise just how much empathy and compassion God’s given more for people with chronic osteo-arthritis, and other disabling diseases and injuries!

And so, tomorrow, with both hospital visits and human prognosis’s (prognoses??) in mind, I’ll head to the airport tomorrow morning!

Thank you for your prayers: won’t it be marvellous when a surgeon says – ‘Nothing wrong here!’….?